


A Fact-Based Study on John Watson

by n00blici0us



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-27
Updated: 2011-08-27
Packaged: 2017-10-23 03:03:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/245582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/n00blici0us/pseuds/n00blici0us
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock tries to understand John's motivation for staying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Fact-Based Study on John Watson

Sherlock catalogues a lot of people. It’s what he does for a living, sort of. But it’s hard for him to catalogue John Watson. Beyond the obvious, obviously. He knows that John was an army surgeon, that he has served in Afghanistan, that he has this psychosomatic limp. He knows that John has a sister—Harriet, Sherlock wouldn’t forget that—and he knows that John likes a spot of tea in the morning with one lump of sugar and just a dash of milk (but they are often out of milk so John has to make do with a wedge of lemon, not nearly the same thing at all). But what Sherlock doesn’t know, doesn’t understand, is why John remains his flatmate. Oh, he knows the obvious reasons, monetary concern living in London, unable to hold a steady job at first, army pensions not nearly being enough—but John has a job now. He could make do with a small flat by himself. Or, heavens knew, he could find himself a flatmate that didn’t leave severed heads in the refrigerator and did remember to pick up the milk every once in a while. So why does John stay?

Sherlock ponders the question with his usual tenacity and dry observations.

Fact: John seems willing to put up with Sherlock more than anyone else.

Evidence: Donovan might call him a freak, but John never looks at him that way. He never makes Sherlock feel as though he were anything less than what he is. He still starts in wonder when Sherlock spouts his conclusions at a crime scene, just like the first day that they met. It’s quite obvious that Sherlock cannot change his true nature and obviously abysmal of Donovan or Anderson to think that he could. Sherlock can no more change his noticing and putting together everything around him than a leopard can change his spots. There. Sherlock just thought about himself in the most clichéd fashion. Also, John has lasted longer in Sherlock’s company than anyone else, exception Lestrade, who doesn’t really count in this exercise because Sherlock never had a pint with Lestrade. Or shared significant non-work time with him.

Conclusion: Perhaps John understands Sherlock in the way that Mycroft understands him—though he hates to admit to that fact. A shaky conclusion given the scant evidence, but one nonetheless. Or—conclusion, John is too wowed by Sherlock’s brilliance to do anything but want to orbit around him—like the Earth orbits the Sun. See? Sherlock can learn useless information too. But then there is the small matter of John being quite clever himself. Final conclusion, John enjoys sparring with Sherlock’s intellect, finding someone who can match (and exceed) him at a game of wits, thus making it worth his time to hang around Sherlock.

Fact: John doesn’t bring home female companions after Sarah.

Evidence: Quite obvious evidence since there are no girls in the flat after Sarah. Of course, Sherlock can’t be 100% sure that John doesn’t just bring them home in the odd moments that Sherlock leaves the flat to go to Bart’s, but given his habit of popping back in, Sherlock calculates that the odds would be very low that John manages to sneak them out every time without Sherlock noticing.

Conclusion: Again, an obvious one. After the debacle with Sarah, John is afraid of getting putting anyone in Sarah’s position—tied to a chair with a very lethal crossbow pointing at her. He can’t handle all the extraneous emotions that went along with a relationship, especially given their penchant for jumping headlong into trouble, so he has decided to take after Sherlock himself and cut out frivolous things such as emotional ties. Plus, women are not interested in men who get them kidnapped (even though they are rescued!) and who put their lives in danger. That does not discount the idea of men, however. But John himself had settled it the first day when he had been so adamant that he and Sherlock were not a couple. Sherlock dismisses the notion that John is interested in men.

Fact: John cooks dinner for Sherlock some nights and orders takeaway other nights even though Sherlock rarely (never) returned the favor.

Evidence: John gets annoyed when the kitchen was unpresentable and cannot be used for making food. He is unnaturally squeamish—given that he is a doctor—about the presence of experiments in the kitchen potentially mixing in with their foodstuffs. Sometimes Sherlock has a hard time believing that he was even a surgeon, given his level of squeamishness at some of Sherlock’s experiments.

Conclusion: John loves food. He is always trying to press some on Sherlock, even though he knows perfectly well that Sherlock does not eat when he is on a case—it slows one down, he repeats forcefully. But John persists in trying out new recipes, trying to tempt Sherlock with new restaurants, anything to get Sherlock to eat. Final conclusion, John is a secret foodie and he is attempting to pass on that trait to Sherlock.

Fact: After the deal with Moriarty, John has nightmares.

Evidence: Some mornings John wakes up with dark circles under his eyes, hair mussed from a night of tossing and turning. Sherlock always notices with a sharp glance, but doesn’t know how to broach the subject besides—“Do you think we should turn down the heat at night? Research shows that sleep is better when the room temperature is two degrees below optimal awake room temperature.” John merely grunts in reply and staggers off to the shower. Sherlock has noticed that John is not very civil in the morning—the fondness for morning tea, after all. Other nights Sherlock doesn’t sleep and hears John crying out in his bedroom. They could be nightmares from Afghanistan, but those had tapered off within days of John moving into 221B so Sherlock can only surmise that these are new, different ones. And John yells out “Sherlock” more than once, usually coupled with the word “run.”

Conclusion: John dreams about Moriarty getting away with his fiendish scheme to kill both he and Sherlock. It would bring any normal person to their knees.

John walks in as Sherlock is sitting at his chair, hands steepled underneath his chin. “What are you ruminating on now?”

“You,” answers Sherlock succinctly.

“Fascinating, it must be,” John says. “I’m off to the market. We’ve run out of milk again.” He swings by Sherlock’s chair and drops a kiss on his unruly curls. “Don’t blow anything up while I’m out.” Then he walks down the stairs and out the flat.

Sherlock sits still for a moment, then—

Fact: John kisses him.

Evidence: John just kissed him on the top of his head.

Conclusion: John does like him. And perhaps John also likes men.

Sherlock smiles, satisfied at his conclusions of the morning. The last conclusion throws a whole new level into his calculations and he’ll have to start all over again in light of the new evidence. Brilliant.


End file.
